Mary Vallo’s gift was her ability to make others feel special, her family says.
“We always felt that as kids, but as we got older we realized she was that way to everybody,” said her daughter, Leslie Marchetti of De Soto. “She never said, ‘I don’t have time’ or ‘I can’t make it.’”
Mrs. Vallo, the longtime co-operator of Drummond Florist in De Soto, died June 29 at 62 of complications from cancer.
Her sister and business partner, Julie Ott, 59, said the two worked well together.
“We respected each other's opinion. We had little spats about this or that, but it never lasted more than an hour or two,” Julie said. “She was my best friend.”
The sisters and their four siblings grew up in De Soto in a tightly-knit extended family.
“Our dad started Drummond Nursery in 1968, and we all helped out there,” Julie said.
Mary married young and had two children in five years, then was divorced when son Grant Bowen was a toddler.
“She was amazing,” Leslie recalls. “You’d think there was no way a young single mom could take care of a house and yard and still work full time, but she did it.”
That made for some long, crazy days, though.
“Most families ate dinner at 5,” Grant said. “We were lucky if we ate before 9 o’clock.”
“That said, though, it was always a full meal,” Leslie said. “Our friends would come to eat, and they’d ask, ‘Does she always cook like this?’”
Both Leslie and Grant say their mother taught them many skills and kept them in line.
“She was loveable but it was tough love,” Grant said. “She made sure we knew what was important.”
The Drummond sisters opened their florist business on Easton Street in 1980. When the building was destroyed in a fire in 1989, they purchased land on Hwy. 21 and built the current location.
Although they had experience with plants and flowers, the two enlisted help in the early days.
‘We hired a couple of professional designers for the first 10 years or so,” Julie said. “We went to a lot of clinics, seminars, training, design classes. Over the 40 years, we had ups and downs, but it’s been a very strong business.”
Julie said Mrs. Vallo’s personality was well-suited to handling customers.
“I'm more of a chatterbox; Mary was more laid back and a listener. People really respected her,” Julie said. “She didn’t say much, but when she did, they were good words, kind words.”
She also had a good rapport with the young people who worked for the florist through high school and college employment programs
“She was good with them, although she was more stern than I was. They knew when she said something, she meant it,” Julie said. “We’ve gotten notes from a lot of them, talking about how they learned important life skills from us.”
Mrs. Vallo was known as a wizard with flour as well as flowers.
“She made muffins, cakes, pies, for a lot of people,” Julie said.
Grant said his mom was both tireless as well as selfless.
“She’d go to my son’s baseball game, then to my niece’s volleyball game, then to my nephew’s game,” he said. “Then it was back to the florist till midnight, then home to make muffins – then back at the florist at 8 the next morning.”
Leslie said her mother had a servant’s heart.
“She took care of people without them realizing,” she said. “She did things she thought were no big deal, but that were huge to customers. We would always hear, ‘The flowers at my wedding were just perfect” or ‘She took such good care of us at the funeral’ or ‘My prom flowers were gorgeous.’”
Mary met Tony Vallo around 1990 through an aunt who worked with him at the De Soto Post Office. The two were married in 2009, a year after Grant’s wedding.
“We joked they had an 18-year engagement,” Julie said. “I think it was because she wanted to put her children first.”
Mrs. Vallo was diagnosed with cancer in early 2017 and underwent chemotherapy and radiation treatment.
“We thought she was fine, but it came back in January,” Julie said.
As the year progressed, she grew more uncomfortable with the side effects of chemo, including severe stomach pain, and finally was hospitalized for pain and dehydration. Under virus lockdown rules she couldn’t have visitors.
“I think, in that time, she came to terms with it all and decided to just put it in God’s hands,” her sister said. “She found peace in her faith.”
When Mrs. Vallo told her children doctors could offer her no further help, she was serene.
“We held her hand and cried like 2-year-olds,” Grant said. “But she just said, ‘It’ll be OK.’ I don’t think I saw her shed a tear from there until the end.”
Mrs. Vallo reacted in typical fashion to those who came to say goodbye.
“A lot of people came to visit in the last couple of days,” Leslie said. “She would compliment them. She told an aunt, ‘That outfit looks good on you.’ She told my daughter, ‘Your hair smells good.” Not in a gushing way, just simply telling you what you meant to her.”
Mrs. Vallo died at home, with her husband and children by her side.
“Genuine is a really great way to describe her,” Leslie said. “She did exactly what she wanted, did it with grace and strength. That’s been her whole life.
“She led by example, and you followed her because you wanted to be like her.”
“Life Story,” posted Saturdays on Leader Publications’ website, focuses on one individual’s impact on his or her community.