Want to know the quickest way to start a battle of opinions on the home front?
As step No. 1, select any number of do-it-yourself projects.
Then, recruit two headstrong people to take on the tasks. They are bound to have opposing views on how to do the project and each one will think the other person is wrong.
It doesn’t help if the original installation was flawed. For example, replacing a sink and countertop will be a nightmare if the homebuilder didn’t square off corners to begin with.
But it doesn’t take a remodeling effort to set tempers on edge. Expect added spice in your life whenever you make a change to the old home place, like putting up a new gate on the driveway.
In the case I’m thinking of, the gate was chosen by the lady of the house, who left it up to the gentleman of the house to figure out how to hang it.
He asked for advice, but then ignored suggestions. His independence did not prevent continual grumbling to his mate, the kids and even the dog about the utter ridiculousness of the entire project.
When the work was finally done, he complained that his fingers had been jabbed by screwdrivers and a black-and-blue thumb was evidence that he’d been at war with a hammer, as well. However, all it took was a bit of praise from an outsider, and you’d think the project had been HIS from the get-go.
Even small projects like assembling a desk or bookcase can be a challenge when half the parts are missing or the instructions are written in an unknown language.
Doesn’t it seem the package always has too few screws or bolts, or the frame has holes in the wrong place or not there at all? Usually you’re halfway through the project before you notice the problems.
I decided to put a small desk together myself. Every half-hour my husband asked, “Are you done yet?”
Eight hours later, I still wasn’t finished. Eventually, I didn’t have any spare parts left, so figured I must be done, only to discover I’d put a couple of parts on backward.
You know what? They’re STILL backward. Done is done.
Years ago, when our oldest son was still in high school, my better half wanted to change a light fixture in the kitchen to a larger, oblong fluorescent light. Our son happened to be home, and with no experience under his belt about how badly it could go, he happily offered to help.
His job was to hold the light assembly in place, while his father secured it with screws. The process took longer than anticipated, however, and after a while he complained that his arms were giving out.
I felt sorry for him, but I was far too short to hold up the fixture myself, so I got the dust mop and used the mop end of it to press against the fixture, letting him give his arms a rest.
The last person to use the mop had not taken it outdoors for a good shake before putting it back in the closet.
So, instead of cramped arms, the teenager and his dad ended up with dust in their noses and eyes and dust bunnies down their necks.
The family considered me the “hopeless helper,” and once again, despite my good intentions, I lived up to my nickname.
CHICKEN SOUP WITH CORNBREAD DUMPLINGS
2 cups cooked, cubed chicken
1 cup sliced celery
1 cup fresh baby carrots (cut in half crosswise)
1/4 cup sliced green onions
1 (1.2-ounce) package creamy pesto sauce mix
2 (16-ounce) cans ready-to-serve fat-free chicken broth
1/3 cup all-purpose flour
1/3 cup yellow cornmeal
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 cup milk
1 tablespoon oil
1 egg
In a Dutch oven, combine chicken, celery, carrots, onions, pesto sauce mix and broth; mix well. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat to low; cover and cook 10 minutes.
Meanwhile, in medium bowl, combine flour, cornmeal and baking powder; mix well. Add milk, oil and egg; stir just until dry ingredients are moistened.
Drop dumpling dough by rounded tablespoonfuls onto boiling soup. Cover; cook 12 to 15 minutes or until dumplings are fluffy and no longer doughy on bottom. Serves 4, with 320 calories and 11 grams of fat per serving.
PIZZA-IN-A-PIE
3/4 pound lean ground beef
1/2 cup pizza sauce
2 tablespoons ketchup
2 1/2 ounces (1/2 cup) sliced pepperoni, quartered
1/4 cup grated Parmesan cheese
1 (10-ounce) can refrigerated pizza crust (or make one of your own)
1 (4.5-ounce) jar sliced mushrooms, drained
1/3 cup chopped green bell pepper
1/4 cup sliced ripe olives
6 ounces (1 1/2 cups) shredded mozzarella cheese
Heat oven to 400 degrees. Spray 9-inch pie pan with nonstick cooking spray. Brown ground beef in medium skillet over medium high heat until thoroughly cooked, stirring frequently. Drain.
Stir in pizza sauce, ketchup, pepperoni and Parmesan cheese. Cook 3 to 5 minutes or until thoroughly heated, stirring occasionally.
Unroll dough into sprayed pie pan, stretching dough while pressing firmly in bottom and up sides of pan. Spoon hot beef mixture into crust. Top with mushrooms, bell pepper, olives and mozzarella cheese.
Bake at 400 degrees for 15 to 20 minutes or until crust is golden brown. Let stand 10 minutes. When ready to serve, cut into 6 wedges. 410 calories and 21g fat per wedge of pizza.
APPLES ’N CREAM DESSERT SQUARES
1 regular size package yellow cake mix
1/2 cup coconut
1/2 cup margarine or butter, softened
1 (21-ounce) can apple fruit pie filling
1/2 cup sugar
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1 cup dairy sour cream
1 egg
Heat oven to 350 degrees. In a large bowl, combine cake mix, coconut and margarine; blend at low speed until crumbly.
Press mixture evenly in bottom and 1/2 inch up sides of ungreased 13-by-9-inch pan. Spread pie filling over cake mixture. In small bowl, combine sugar and cinnamon; sprinkle over filling. In same small bowl, blend sour cream and egg; spoon evenly over filling.
Bake at 350 degrees F. for 25-35 minutes or until edges are light golden brown. Serve warm or cold. Store in refrigerator.
Makes 12 to 15 servings; 1/15 of recipe contains 320 calories and 14 g fat.
CHICKEN AND ASPARAGUS ROLL-UPS
8 lasagna noodles
1 cup diagonally-sliced asparagus spears (about 1-inch pieces)
1 jar (16-ounce) Alfredo pasta sauce, divided
2 cups (8-ounces) shredded Italian-blend cheese, divided
1 1/2 cups shredded or chopped cooked chicken tenderloins
Olive oil
2 teaspoons smoked paprika
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
1/2 cup shredded Parmesan cheese to sprinkle on top
1 tablespoon chopped fresh basil
Cook lasagna noodles according to package directions. Drain; rinse under cold water to stop the cooking. Arrange cooked noodles on work surface or on sheets of waxed paper. Cook asparagus in simmering water until tender-crisp. Drain; rinse with cold water. Drain again; set aside. (If you use frozen asparagus, just thaw it out and it’s ready to use.)
Sprinkle 4 small chicken tenderloins with smoked paprika and garlic powder. Using a small amount of olive oil, in a small skillet, cook about 4 small chicken tenderloins until juices run clear. Remove to a cutting board. Let cool and slice or chop into small pieces.
Spread 3/4 cup of the alfredo pasta sauce in the bottom of a 13-by-9-inch baking dish or pan. In a medium bowl, combine 1 and 1/4 cups of the shredded Italian cheese, 1/2 cup of alfredo sauce, asparagus and chicken; mix well. Spoon heaping 1/3 cup of the mixture down the center of each lasagna noodle. Roll up; place seam-side down in dish or pan. Spoon remaining sauce over lasagna rolls.
Cover dish or pan with foil. Bake in preheated 375 degree oven for 30 minutes or until heated through. Uncover; sprinkle remaining 1/4 cup Italian cheese and shredded Parmesan cheese over rolls. Continue baking 5 minutes or until cheese is melted. Garnish with basil, if desired.
