I already have three “save the dates” clipped to my fridge for weddings that will occur in 2024.
I am at an age where many of my friends are getting hitched, so I attend a lot of weddings. I generally enjoy the celebratory events – except for a few cringe-worthy traditions.
Some traditions are a good thing and have great meaning, but others, like the cake smash or garter toss, need to end.
Just because you witnessed a tradition growing up or someone else did it does not mean it’s mandatory that you have to include it in your celebration.
The first tradition I wish would end is the garter toss. It makes my skin crawl.
Let’s all watch the groom climb under his bride’s dress in front of all their family and friends. You can witness the bride’s family as they stand in a corner and wince, while the groom’s buddies whoop and holler.
Most of us know what happens on a wedding night and none of us need the pre-show.
I understand it is meant to be a lighthearted way to show off a couple’s excitement for each other, but since they just got married, we can all assume they like one another, or at least we hope they do.
While discussing a friend’s recent nuptials, she mentioned how uncomfortable she was during the garter toss. I asked her why she even went through with the tradition and she replied that because it seems to be done at every wedding, she followed suit without much thought about it.
This is the problem with many traditions. If the tradition means nothing to you, you are not compelled to include it in your big day.
Your wedding should be about you and your intended, not maintaining the status quo of traditions and trends.
I also strongly dislike the bouquet toss. When the DJ starts to play “Single Ladies,” that is my cue to take a bathroom break. I avoid this tradition at all costs.
This tradition is less cringe-worthy, but it forces the idea that marriage is some great accomplishment women should fight each other to achieve.
Being single is OK and being in a long-term relationship without being married is OK. There’s no need to fight to see who should walk down an aisle next.
The worst wedding tradition is the cake smash.
I absolutely hate watching couples smash cake into each other’s faces. It leaves me wondering if they even love each other at all.
Most cake smashing seems to come from a place of disdain. Sure, it can seem funny and fun but when you have paid someone to do your makeup and wear a dress that can cost four figures, there is nothing funny about it.
I have witnessed several cake smashes when I thought by the forceful way that the couples smashed the cake into each other’s faces, I was left with the feeling that I was not so sure they love each other. Most of the couples which I have had that thought about have been divorced within three years.
Now, I think cutting the cake together, putting a small piece on a fork, and gently feeding each other can be nice, however, there is nothing nice about smashing it into someone’s face.
There are some traditions I like and will include on my big day someday, like the exchange of vows and someone meaningful walking you down the aisle.
Recently I have noticed a new wedding tradition to have guests take photos for their entry into the guest book instead of simply writing their name. I enjoy that one.
Weddings are fun events and I always have a blast attending them, and at the end of the day the celebration is about the newlywed couple and not the guests.
Whenever you plan your big day, plan traditions that make you feel comfortable and not because it’s something your parents and grandparents did.
