A grieving parent never has to walk alone.
At least that’s the goal for the Cherish community outreach program, a nonprofit group sponsored by Chapel Hill Mortuary in Cedar Hill that offers a grief support program for parents who have lost children.
The group is holding its 12th annual Walking for Our Children event at 9:30 a.m. Saturday, Sept. 9.
“(The walk) gives (parents) a chance to come and honor their child regardless of if the death occurred 30 years ago or three years ago,” said Katie Noll, a child life specialist and grief resource counselor with Cherish. “It gives them the message that their grief is not forgotten. We know that grief doesn’t go away.”
The free walk will begin on the lower parking lot at Northwest High School, 6005 Cedar Hill Road, in Cedar Hill, and participants will walk a mile to Chapel Hill Memorial Gardens. For those who prefer not to walk, they may meet at 10:45 a.m. at Chapel Hill, 6300 Hwy. 30. A remembrance service and a dove release will be held at 11 a.m.
Sam Hofstetter, coordinator for the Cherish program, said Noll and Brian May, owner of Chapel Hill, will speak at the service. She said one or two parents typically speak as well.
“It reminds those who are maybe further out in their grief situation that their grief is still valid,” Noll said. “It’s still OK to be sad and it’s still OK to have joyful moments and it’s still OK to come out and honor them if that feels right.”
Noll said the grief support services Chapel Hill are offered to any community members for free and do not require any affiliation with the funeral services company.
Chapel Hill offers two support groups. The first, for grieved parents, is held on the first Tuesday of every month. The second, for people who have lost a partner or spouse, is held every third Tuesday of the month. Both meet at 6 p.m. at the Northwest Administrative Center, 4290 Gravois Road, in House Springs.
“It’s about giving them a safe space to come and share whatever is in their heart if they want to share,” Noll said. “They’re in a room surrounded by people who get it, who are in the same boat.”
Noll said the most important thing someone can do to help a loved one through a loss is to be there to listen.
“While seeing a loved one in pain can be discomforting, it’s vital to stay attentive,” she said. “One of the best things that family members and friends can do is ask them, ‘What can I do for you?’ Even offering a couple of different suggestions: ‘Would it be most helpful if I picked the kids up from school or would it be more helpful to start a meal train?’
“Giving them two choices makes it a little easier to choose, especially when your brain is kind of stuck in that fog of grief. Just making it simple and spelling it out.”
Noll said grief is a universal experience but everyone handles it differently.
Noll said children also are invited to attend the walk.
“Kids grieve, too,” she said. “Including them in a situation like (the Walking for Our Children event) demonstrates this healthy coping, that it’s OK to honor and talk about the person and remember.
“It’s OK to cry and have sad moments about the person, but it’s also OK to still have joyful moments in life.”
For more information, visit cherish.org, or call 314-394-1474.